


Fatal Love

by joel_on



Category: K-pop, Monsta X (Band), Wonho - Fandom
Genre: Blood, BoyxBoy, Fantasy, Gods, M/M, Mythology - Freeform, Top Im Changkyun | I.M, Violence, blowjob, boyslove, fantasies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-25
Updated: 2020-11-25
Packaged: 2021-03-10 06:47:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,609
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27709265
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/joel_on/pseuds/joel_on
Summary: "He could taste the blood between their lips"A story in which Changkyun is the god of war, very annoyed and very turned on.
Relationships: Chae Hyungwon/Im Changkyun | I.M, Chae Hyungwon/Lee Minhyuk, Im Changkyun | I.M/Everyone, Im Changkyun | I.M/Lee Hoseok | Wonho, Im Changkyun | I.M/Lee Jooheon, Im Changkyun | I.M/Son Hyunwoo | Shownu, Im Changkyun | I.M/Yoo Kihyun
Kudos: 28





	Fatal Love

**Author's Note:**

> I also posted the story on my wattpad account:  
> joel_on_
> 
> feel free to check out this story and my other stories there as well.

Changkyun was spinning the small silvery dagger between his skilled fingers mindlessly. It wouldn’t even take him the blink of an eye to reach over the huge table and stab the small blade right into the pulsing vein of the other’s annoyingly bright and exposed neck. 

Shownu was sitting at the head of the long table, his golden shimmering skin was shining so brightly to the point that it was nearly blinding. However, there was no light coming from his direction. Changkyun hated the warmth and the feeling of security and comfort the other was radiating by simply being present instead. He hated how the feeling would crawl under his skin and into his flesh until it reached his bones and how he felt himself relax a little against his will, taming the flame of anger burning inside him. The only warm feeling Changkyun ever truly enjoyed and appreciated was the heat of the blood of his victims splashed all over his face and running over his finger when he let his blades slide through the soft and vulnerable parts of their bodies, wrecking what couldn’t be cut or stabbed with his bare fists.

More often than not Changkyun wanted to take his blade and cut the other’s golden skin just for the sake of destroying this repugnantly flawless image. He wanted to let his dagger run deep until blood would dirty the flesh, dulling the golden shimmer in deep red. He could feel his own blood boiling from excitement whenever he thought about cutting from the neck down to the abdomen, opening the chest to find out if the organs were also shining or not. Digging his hand into the bloody mess to rip the heart out of its dark prison and crushing the beating organ in his bare hands until it would burst.

That wouldn’t kill the other, though. Nothing could, as he would live for as long as the sun was shining, but that only scratched Changkyun’s inner, initial instincts even more. He loved when his prey put up a good fight. The challenge and the uncertainty tickled inside his chest and made his fingers twitch.

If only that annoyingly bright light would fade. He knew that he couldn’t win against the god of the sun if he really were to jump at the other – ready to kill, but that didn’t stop him from seriously wanting to try it. It wasn’t exactly apathy about his own life, but rather the simple, instinctual satisfaction that would fill his chest what was leading Changkyun forward. It was only after a good fight on the battlefield when he didn’t needed to care which side and what motives his opponents were fighting for and with an distinctive amount of kills on his side that the burning of his muscles and the heavy movements of his lungs would leave him in an exhilarated mood. His mind fogged by the clashing sounds of war and the painful screams and pleads of his victims. The smell of blood and death filling his brain like a heavy liquid. 

His eyes started to hurt, but when Changkyun turned his head a little away from Shownu to relax his eyes his mood got even worse. Minhyuk who was seated on Shownu’s left side was smiling so damn brightly, as if he was trying to beat the god of the sun in some kind of useless competition. The other was always wearing a wide smile on his lips and that was what Changkyun hated the most. 

He wanted to rip that stupid smile of the other’s face even more than he wanted to get rid of the damn light. The other’s always-joyful mood and expression was triggering and challenging Changkyun at the same time. How long would it take for this damn smile to disappear? How many cuts would the other be able to endure, before he would scream in pain deliciously? Changkyun normally was no friend of torture. He loved killing for the physical act and the brutal honesty it required. Killing was simple and easy to understand. Torture however required a plan and patience and had the goal of keeping the other alive as long as possible with the maximum amount of pain.

That was Hyungwon’s thing. And more importantly, Changkyun had no patience at all.

Nevertheless, in this very moment Changkyun could see all the positive aspects of torture. He wanted to try and break the smiling blonde’s back open, leaving the spine exposed for everyone to see. He wanted to break the rips and turn them around, before pulling the lungs over the spread bones creating wings of blood and flesh. He had seen Hyungwon do this before and even though he had no personal gain from this he was still temped to try.

If Minhyuk was still able to flash his stupid smile even after this Changkyun could still always punch the other’s teeth out of his face, take a needle and thread, and sew that damn mouth shut forever. 

This smile was so annoyingly broad and kind that it almost managed to conceal the dirty mind behind it. Changkyun knew that Minhyuk was trying to be a reliable friend, the perfect companion and a thoughtful lover. But, even Minhyuk couldn’t leave his skin and fight against his nature. 

He had seen the other’s face during the most sinful and lustful actions one could think of. Receiving pleasure by taking and being taken by countless men and women at the same time. When pure ecstasy was running through the other’s veins faster than blood, the nerves in his body so overly sensitive that each simple touch was able to throw him over the edge. Sometimes Changkyun had joined Minhyuk’s orgy and sometimes he just watched how men and women tried to wreck each other, giving and receiving pain as it was fueling the raw lust. But he never really understood the advantages. Moments like this were the only times when the other was showing a true and sincere smile on his face.

Maybe that was the reason why Hyungwon and Minhyuk were such a good team. Minhyuk liked the pain Hyungwon was enjoying and willing to give.

On Shownu’s right side was Kihyun. In comparison to Shownu and Minhyuk’s dashing figure, Kihyun was just plain and dull. His presence was so nondescript that one could easily oversee him or not even notice that the other was there, but that was also his biggest strength. Because even though Changkyun was annoyed and angered by the fact that someone could live as unprepossessingly as Kihyun did, he was also a little scared of the other’s unpredictability.

His ability to be able to simply vanish into his surroundings made it impossible to predict what Kihyun was thinking or doing. He was like a whisper inside someone’s head, giving instructions and influencing others in doing exactly what he wanted them to do. Changkyun hated being manipulated and if he had the opportunity to choose to kill one of them, he would definitely chose Kihyun without hesitation. The feeling of slowly losing yourself and someone else taking over your thoughts you’re your whole being was the worst.

Kihyun had tried to control Changkyun once and when Changkyun had felt his own self slipping through his fingers he had made sure that the other wouldn’t dare to ever try it again. The missing eye and the huge, pink scar running from his forehead down to his shoulder were the only silent witnesses of Changkyun’s wrath. If only Shownu hadn’t stopped him that day.

The one who Changkyun didn’t wanted to kill all the time as much as he did with the others, was Wonho who was sitting between him and Kihyun. Wonho, just like himself, loved the act of war and battle. They would often fight side by side in the meaningless wars of the humans, trying to surpass each other in terms of power and importance. But in opposite to Changkyun who enjoyed the simplicity of killing and the rush of the blood Wonho enjoyed the act of competition. He didn’t necessarily needed to kill for him to enjoy a good fight.

Changkyun couldn’t really understand the meaning behind a fight without the intention of wiping out the other’s existence, but as long as Wonho wouldn’t interfere with his slaughter he couldn’t care less. Nonetheless, Changkyun always kept an open eye whenever he was around the other because as much as Wonho liked the competition and the fight; he liked to win and hated to lose even more. And for that any means suited him.

Changkyun had found himself in one of Wonho's traps countless times already, which only had fueled his own bloodlust even more. Wonho wouldn’t hesitate to stab him in the back anytime as long as it suited himself and positively influenced his own situation. But no matter how many tricks Wonho played, in terms of pure fighting power he was no match up for Changkyun and both of them knew that. It was more like a pointless game both of them played whenever they would feel sick of each other.

The most annoying of them all, however, was sitting right opposite of Changkyun, looking at him through black, dead eyes with an indifferent look, bored even. He had learned to read the small movements of emotions in the other’s expressionless face one could easily miss if you didn’t watch closely.

And that was the reason why Changkyun was so fucking annoyed to the point where he wanted to punch himself. Because Hyungwon somehow had managed to make him care, to make him pay attention to all the small details. One of the advantages of killing was that it was the easiest way to get rid of everything going on Changkyun’s nerves and get rid of those countless useless and meaningless beings. Simply because he didn’t wanted to burden himself with the unnecessary feeling of concern about others than himself.

Changkyun didn’t really care – or at least that was what he telling himself all the time, but he knew that every single one he killed was making Hyungwon more powerful. Of course, he would never admit it, but occasionally Changkyun would end the lives of a needless amount of extra people only so that their meaningless existences could be useful for once. Each soul that passed the gates into the down world of Hyungwon’s territory was adding a little more strength to Hyungwon’s already immense power. 

Shownu was the strongest of them when it came to physical strength, but Hyungwon the most powerful. The living were worshipping Shownu, but their lives were short and easily vanished. The dead however stayed dead forever until Hyungwon would feast on their souls to also gain physical strength.

The more souls passed the gates due to Changkyun’s actions the more pleased Hyungwon was. It wouldn’t show on the other’s face but Changkyun could see it and then he could feel the anticipation at the back of his neck, tickling inside his chest. 

The more pleased and lusciously filled Hyungwon was the more he started to hate. Hate was an easy feeling and easy to act on and the only feeling Changkyun was confident in.

Jooheon also hated. However, his hate was different from Changkyun’s own. Jooheon hated what he couldn’t have, making him to want it even more. Jooheon worshipped Shownu like no one else of them did and it resembled in his own appearance. His golden locks and round cheeks making him appear almost childlike and innocent were adored by the humans more than anything, but they could never match up to Shownu’s balance and tranquility.

Because Jooheon’s insides were as dark as his outer appearance was bright. The more Jooheon tried to be like Shownu, because he admired him, the more he hated him because he could never be like the other. Envy was tainting his whole being just like a single drop of ink could stain a whole glass full of water. One dark thought was enough to overshadow all his good motivations. When Jooheon had his good days Changkyun couldn’t stand him. But when he had his bad days Changkyun enjoyed to join the other and fuel their imagination and fantasies about killing the sun.

Hyungwon however was neither like them. Because what he hated the most was himself and he hated so badly and intensely that in his worst moments he would invite Changkyun into the dark nothingness of his own, pleading him to kill and end his eternal life.

Changkyun would follow the other’s plead every time. Not for Hyungwon – he would say, but for himself because he was always doing everything just for himself. Because killing Hyungwon was different.

Hyungwon didn’t chase like Changkyun did. He attracted and whatever belonged to him would find him sooner or later. Hyungwon enjoyed torturing because the pain of others was his personal amusement, but rather than that, he just liked playing with his prey. They would eventually die and fall into the palm of his hands anyways, so killing had no meanings to him.

However the more he fed on the human souls, the more he was also taking in the weight of their simple-minded emotional burden. The collision of countless naïve emotions – no matter if good or bad – was pulling and pushing his inner self until he couldn’t endure it anymore and would ask Changkyun to kill him so that the mess and the thousand voices inside his head would all shut up.

Against all odds, Changkyun truthfully enjoyed to kill and torture the other slowly and without mercy. Having the powerful and intimidating god of the dead in front of him, vulnerable and with all his weaknesses being displayed in front of him, Changkyun felt a rush of incomparable excitement and arousal run through his whole body. The honest feeling of pure control was the best and Changkyun liked to enjoy and taste every single drop of it.

It was amusing to see how Hyungwon who could torture for days without any hint of emotion on his face, was whining and pleading for him to kill him quickly. Changkyun knew that the human emotions had filled every corner of the other’s body and mind, making him feel every single one of them so strongly and intense that Hyungwon had the feeling they would crawl out of his pores any second.

Seeing the other’s body tremble and the helpless expression with the flushed cheeks on the other’s normally hard and cold face was only strengthening the feeling of control Changkyun had. He had the other in the palm of his hands and at his mercy. That kind of heated and agitated rush, creeping its way from Changkyun’s abdomen down his legs and up his back until it reached his cervical vertebrae, was unrivaled. No kill, no slaughter, no war, no massacre Changkyun has experienced could match up to the anticipation of this.

Their eyes would always meet, only for a brief moment, after Hyungwon would kneel down right in front of Changkyun and with his hands, skillfully opening the others pants. There was no need to look at each other longer than that, trying to read something behind the doors to their minds. Because they both knew.

Changkyun had to admit that the liked the way the other looked when he was kneeling in front of him. Despite the darkness of Hyungwon’s world, he could easily see the outline of the other’s slim, but fit figure with the long neck and the deep collarbones. Tainted by the influence of the human souls he had fed on making him appear almost mortal, Hyungwon was still beautiful and strong in his own way. 

Alluring like the death himself and not quite human yet, but close enough so that Changkyun was entertained by the idea of completely destroying him. Greeting the temptation of bringing Hyungwon down to his level, ruining him and making him all fucked up and dirty with open arms. Before deciding for himself when he would finally end the others life.

He wouldn’t say anything, knowing that with the silence lingering between them Hyungwon would take his time. The urge to be killed was strong and burning inside his chest, but even the god of the dead himself couldn’t leave his skin and tried to desperately grab onto the last bit of control and power he had as long as he could. It amused Changkyun to see the other caught between playing to pretend that he didn’t needed it and yet needing it so badly that it was almost suffocating.

But Changkyun was no different. He really had no fucking patience and having Hyungwon between his legs and his head at the junction of his hips and thighs, but his red and plump lips not quite touching his heated flesh yet was indeed great torture.

He would arch his hips a little forward, just enough for his dick to brush against the other’s trembling lips and Hyungwon would accept the invitation with a smile, placing open and hot kissed on the head, licking and inviting it into the soft yet wet and warm depth of his mouth.

The heavy sweetness Changkyun would feel at the back of his own throat reminded him of how much he needed this, and how much that thought was scaring him. He would always remind himself that he was the one in control, because Hyungwon was doing this for Changkyun to kill him. That in those moments, he had control over death himself.

Generated by that beautiful and sinful mouth Changkyun could feel himself getting harder and harder inside its warm prison until pulsating veins appeared. It took a huge amount of self-control on his side to not let his fingers run through the long, black hair of the other, grabbing a handful and shoving the other’s head further into his lap to fuck deeper into his throat.

Hyungwon would let his tongue wander gently but confident, as if he was looking for something while exploring every corner of Changkyun’s length. Something that only Changkyun was able to offer and something that he would have to work for – though it probably couldn’t really be counted as work, as both of them desperately wanted it the same. The feeling of Hyungwon’s mouth salivating around him as his mouth slid down his length with intense present in his mind.

They would both probably blame it on the human influences on Hyungwon’s side which were fogging his mind and playing tricks on him, but Changkyun’s taste and masculine smell and the feeling of the other’s skin under his tongue as he let it slide around the underside and then teasingly working his way back up, was taking over Hyungwon’s senses completely and he was unable to think about anything but about what was right in front of him. The countless voices in his head seemed so far and died down that he couldn’t hear anything but Changkyun’s low growl as his own moan send a vibration through the other’s body.

The sensation of being taken deeper and deeper into Hyungwon’s warm throat until he could feel the tip of his dick touching the hot flesh was sparking like fireworks in his nerves. The other’s gag-reflex had been trained down to non-existence or maybe it hadn’t been there since the beginning, Changkyun couldn’t remember, but the other’s mouth was seemingly made to take it in deep. The tightening around him whenever the Hyungwon was swallowing made his blood boil.

It was no secret to Changkyun that Hyungwon was just as hard and aroused as he was, maybe even more. The human emotions overwhelming his body, creating such an intense overstimulation that Hyungwon could get off without being touched the slightest, just from the knowledge of what he was doing, the feeling on his tongue and the visible effects his actions had. 

Changkyun would tilt his head back a little until his chin was pointing upwards, trying to hold back the moans trying to break free. Sometimes his hand would reach forward, digging through the surprisingly soft and silky, long hair, but neither guiding nor forcing. With his face turned away the feeling of the other’s head bobbing back and forth under his palm was satisfying. The soft sliding movements up and down, and up and down with small pauses of sucking and caressing at the tip in between. Changkyun felt worshipped.

It was in the humans’ nature to fight and to kill for pure entertainment and as the god of war Changkyun was loved. He couldn’t care less about their reasons, but for as long as humans would fight each other they would pray to him, make him offerings and plead to borrow his strength. However, none of their prayers and none of their offerings could compare to this.

The air around them was filled by wet sounds and heavy breathing mixed with low moans as well as this delicious smell Changkyun would enjoy during battle. A mixture of blood and death, but nothing foul or oppressive. Rather than that, it was a sweet, but flagging smell. Intoxicating and addicting. Hyungwon’s smell.

It was hard to hold back the involuntary urge to trust his hips upwards, deeper into that delicious mouth, but rather arching his back to let the sensation fill his whole being. Not because he didn’t wanted to, but because Hyungwon’s black, deep eyes looking at him through half opened lids were basically begging for him to ride his mouth. Hyungwon was willing and Changkyun wanted to see him suffer.

Saliva and pre-cum was glistening wet at the corners of Hyungwon’s red and swollen lips, dripping down his chin sinfully every time he trusted upwards, before working his way down again. Hyungwon wanted him to cum, wanted to taste the other even more, but Changkyun just couldn’t give in to the other yet. Not yet. Just a little longer.

A shiver went through Changkyun's sensitive flesh and made his stomach muscles clench when Hyungwon’s face practically pressed against his abdomen, taking him so deep as if he was trying to take in Changkyun’s whole being. His pride refused him to voice it, but his thighs opening wider for the other was a silent demand for more. 

With his back pressed against something and the god of the dead between his legs, Changkyun sometimes couldn’t stop himself from lifting a hand to his own mouth, letting his own tongue play with his fingers as Hyungwon’s own worked in a way Changkyun had never dared to dream of. Not even war could let his whole body shiver in this kind of pleasure and let him feel his own limits this strongly.

Changkyun was well aware of the other’s tight grip on his thighs, keeping him still and in place and the fact that the other was forgetting about his own strength, leaving deep bruises on Changkyun’s sensitive skin. But the pain was barely registered as it perfectly blended into the bliss caused by the toying and caressing of the tongue and mouth around his burning flesh.

Whatever happened to the god known for his bored indifference towards others, the confidence and trust he only laid in himself and the untouchable distance placed between himself and everyone else was a secret only both of them shared. Almost, but not quite. Because there was the god of death, slowly and skillfully working his way under Changkyun’s skin and into his mind, taking him over piece by piece.

The feeling couldn’t be any more different from when Kihyun was trying to creep his way into Changkyun, replacing his thoughts with Changkyun’s own, ripping the other’s self apart to place himself inside. Hyungwon, however, wasn’t ripping Changkyun apart, but pulling him together, filling what had been empty before, completing what hadn’t been finished. His own self wasn’t slipping through his fingers, but he had a tight grip on ever cell in his body, feeling the heat in every vein.

Hyungwon’s fingernails raking down his thighs would leave deep red lines where they ripped the skin, while his long groan would vibrate through Changkyun’s hard dick, leaving it arching for more. Hyungwon’s specialty was indeed torture – Changkyun couldn’t deny it – but the pleasure letting his spine curve and his fingers grab a handful of the soft black hair indicated that this was a torture he was always willing to take. There couldn’t be anyone fore confident in his actions than Hyungwon as he let his teeth brush again the downside of the heated flesh in his mouth, softly without hurting but creating enough sensation to earn another deep moan.

The urge to let himself go was shaking Changkyun’s insides and he was really close to give up the last bit of self-control he was holding on, but he wouldn’t. Just a little bit longer. Letting go and losing control was a lot easier than to maintain it. Not exactly, opening himself, but letting someone in, letting someone take over and be mastered was tempting. He wanted to hand himself over to ecstasy, be free and be shameless and to take rather than to receive. 

That would be simple and easy, but Changkyun would never allow himself to reach such low. The simple pressure of sliding in and out of Hyungwon’s wet and soft mouth was really all he could take before losing himself. The knot forming inside him, right where the bangs on Hyungwon’s forehead would tickle his skin whenever he was lowering himself, tasting every part of Changkyun, the heavy but sweet and alluring smell of Hyungwon, the deep and breathy groans – it was overwhelming.

Changkyun knew that he was about to cum, but he didn’t care anymore. He had already reached too far into the forbidden areas of his own self, had been taken in too deep by Hyungwon that it didn’t matter anymore. He couldn’t hold back, he never could. It didn’t stop him from trying every damn time, but it was no use.

It hit his pride where it hurt the most, but the feeling was too good. And more importantly he knew that Hyungwon needed it even more than he did. He gave no unnecessary warning before his orgasm hit him like the stroke of thunder. For the split of a second, he forgot how to breathe, how to think, how to be. There was just pleasure and heat and Hyungwon.

Gorgeous and powerful and imperfect Hyungwon who was welcoming Changkyun’s orgasm with his lips sealed around the other’s trembling flesh as cum shot over his tongue and hit the back of his throat. Changkyun’s whole body was shaking as Hyungwon kept working for each and every drop, swallowing what Changkyun had to offer without resistance.

When he remembered how to breathe his lungs were burning and his body, all arching and trembling before, was leaning relaxed against whatever wall or object was behind him. For a moment his mind would feel refreshingly empty and light and he would reach out and let his fingers run over the other’s jawline and lips as they were still parted around his dick, caressing it until it went soft and over-sensitive.

And only then, when nothing but sensitive skin was left, Hyungwon would let go. Their eyes would lock every time while Hyungwon was licking his swollen lips and Changkyun was still caressing the other’s face. Maybe it was the aftermath of his own orgasm or maybe something else, but Changkyun would find himself longing for the one kneeling in front of him more than he ever did for anything else. When Hyungwon would lean into his palm or place small kisses against his wrist Changkyun would find himself wanting. Desiring. Caring.

When Hyungwon rose from his knees fully and looked down on Changkyun through a seemingly emotionless, but flushed expression Changkyun couldn’t help but wonder how someone who had just shamelessly sucked and worshipped someone else’s cock could look as majestic and effortlessly intimidating as Hyungwon did. At the same time Changkyun could see rush of different emotions in the other’s eyes, the stains the human souls left on Hyungwon’s beautiful image.

They ended up meeting halfway when both of them reach for the other, bruised and swollen lips meeting dried out ones in a sloppy, but slow kiss. Hyungwon’s taste was as addicting deliciously sweet as his smell, even though Changkyun could taste the salty flavor of his own semen on the other’s tongue as he explored the hot cavern. 

Changkyun would let his fingers run through the other’s hair, before trailing his way down, over the neck and the shoulder, down the arm. He knew it was unnecessary, but he would let his hands rest against the other’s hips a little longer than needed, before reaching for his silvery dagger. He would pull Hyungwon closer, deepen their kiss, not caring about the fact that his lungs were screaming for air.

He could taste the blood between their lips, the iron taste covering the salty and sweet flavor, when his blade found its way deeper and deeper into the other’s neck. The warm, red liquid streaming down the wound and oozing from his mouth and nose fast. But they would never break the kiss, keeping their lips locked as if it would bring great pain once the seal would be broken.

Hyungwon’s skin would start to feel cold against Changkyun’s own, while his blood was hot on Changkyun’s face. He always waited until that moment, when the human emotions were starting to run out, weakening Hyungwon, but also taking away the ability to feel pain before Changkyun would finally break the kiss before skillfully letting his blade run over the white skin and through the soft flesh, cutting the other’s neck open. His nature made him feel great satisfaction as he watched the life run out of the other’s cold face when their eyes locked and the red blood against the white skin, but it was a different feeling of when he was slaughtering at the battlefield.

Because for once – and even if that feeling only lasted for a brief moment – Changkyun didn’t hate.

It would forever stay a secret between him and the dark nothingness of Hyungwon’s world that he would carefully place the lifeless body of the other on some kind of bed, whipping the blood from his face in a useless attempt to clean him and then watch over him.  
Time was running differently in that place so Changkyun never knew how much time really passed as he was simply lying next to the other’s body, waiting. He didn’t feel sorry for killing Hyungwon, it had been Hyungwon’s wish to die after all and he was never sorry about killing. However, something inside of him made it impossible for him to stand up and leave. 

Hyungwon was probably even more breathtaking in death than he was when he had his lips wrapped around Changkyun’s dick. Sometimes Changkyun would catch himself trailing his fingers over Hyungwon’s features, amazed and in awe. Only death itself was revealing Hyungwon’s true and tremendous beauty, when no human soul was left inside him to dirty him.

While watching him, Changkyun knew that he was giving himself way too much credits and that in the end, he didn’t had any control after all. 

Changkyun let his eyes wander a little, before his glazes met Hyungwon’s over the table, still spinning the silvery dagger between his fingers. He never got to know what Hyungwon was thinking the moment the other re-opened his eyes after his death, because he didn’t dare to stay. The moment Hyungwon’s heart would start beating and the other’s lungs would fill themselves with air again Changkyun would stand up and leave.

Sometimes a little curiosity was tickling him in the back of his mind, telling him to stay just a little longer the next time. To see the flash of the first light in Hyungwon’s eyes, to be the first thing Hyungwon would see and maybe be the first thing the other would think about.

Changkyun felt annoyed by that pure thought alone. All he was supposed to care about was fighting, killing, and blood. He only wanted to care about himself so that it would stay easy and uncomplicated and he didn’t had to deal with anyone but himself. And yet he couldn’t help but wonder if – in that very moment they were looking at each other – Hyungwon was thinking about him. If he, too, was earning and wanting even in this very moment or if that was simply the pressure of the human instincts and emotions?

But Changkyun would never ask. He was too proud to let such a trivial question show his insides and maybe too scared to receive an answer he didn’t wanted to hear. He knew that it had to be enough for him to know that he was the last thing Hyungwon would see and think of before he died. That he was the only one the other would seek for in his worst moments. He wanted to be the only one.

Right before Changkyun wanted to break the eye contact with Hyungwon to stop himself from all those stupid and foolish thoughts and to stop the ghost-feeling of Hyungwon’s lips against his skin, he could see it. Small and gone as fast as it had appeared, not noticeable for anyone who wouldn’t pay close attention to him, but leaving a deep print on Changkyun’s mind. 

Desire.

And Changykun decided that today he would kill once again.


End file.
